3 Secret Steps to Get Your Ex Boyfriend Back...
I’m going to reveal the 3 secret steps to get your ex boyfriend back in just a minute. Before we do that, we need to talk about the mistakes you’re making right now.
Because it’s really important you understand your errors before we can help you progress. REALLY IMPORTANT.
Ok lets continue..
Getting your ex boyfriend back – The biggest mistake you’re making right now!
One of the questions or concerns that I get all the time is “I really screwed up, they’re the one for me and I am totally miserable without them, what can I do right now to get them back? I feel like I’m dying without them”
When I hear stuff like “I have to get him back or I need to get him back or else I’m going to be miserable” my alarms go off because I instantly know you’re putting your ex up on a pedestal.
And basically your putting yourself into a hole because you’re giving your ex boyfriend too much power over you. Are you with me here?
If you really feel that way and that he is the one for you and you can’t be happy without him, then really you need to stop and have a really deep think about what you’re saying.
What you’re most likely thinking is an illusion, it’s not actually real.
Just imagine someone else putting that kind of pressure on you, and thinking that you’re the only one in the world for them, and that if they were without you they couldn’t survive.
That’s a lot of pressure on you right? It puts a lot of pressure on you to perform and provide for this person.
Frankly, it would probably freak you out a bit because someone has put you up so high on a pedestal. You’re the only one keeping them going.
I mean it’s happened to me before where this guy I was going out with at the time told me that his only ambition in life was to be with me and make me happy, only you.
And it’s not that flattering when a guy says this to a women because his saying I don’t have a life outside of you. I’m just going to focus all my energy on you.
On you, you, you. That’s the only thing that makes me happy.
That’s just giving the other person too much power.
Not only does it freak that person out, it makes them question if they even want to be with someone that puts them up so high on the pedestal, where they can’t do anything wrong.
You’re really sabotaging yourself and the relationship because ultimately a relationship is about 2 people working together, to grow together but also to grow as individuals as well.
When you tell yourself that you don’t have anything else in your life going for you except for this “man” then you are just trapping yourself.
Not only that but when you tell yourself this, it’s going to affect the way you interact with you ex boyfriend. His going to sense this very quickly that you really want him back, that you want to please him and you’ll do anything to get him back.
And when you tell yourself that you’ll do anything to get your ex back, then you really need to take a another look at this.
Think about it, you don’t have control, you’re giving someone else control of your happiness which is really dangerous and unhealthy for you.
So the very first thing you need to do is regain control, take back that control from your ex boyfriend. Give the power back to yourself. The only way you can do this is to tell yourself…
I’m going to focus on me and this other person is on my level. They’re not God, and if I don’t have them I’m not going to be miserable.
He has flaws too. He definitely has his issues too. He contributed to the breakdown of the relationship too.
I deserve someone better than that. If that person is willing to put effort back in the relationship and meet me half way then great, we can work something out.
If not then I’m not going to put him on a pedestal and think of him as the greatest human being alive. That’s just not true.
Give the power and energy back to yourself, instead of giving him the power. Stop thinking if I don’t do this then his going to think this and I’m going to feel this way. Stop it!
You know you can’t control how he feels, you can only control how you feel and how you react to different things. So if he’s not going to give you the response that you need, then you’re going to say I’m going to give love to myself.
I don’t care if they don’t give me the attention or love that I desire.
When you pour more of that love back to yourself, focusing on what you want, things that make you happy, your own personal goals, healthy goals, then your ex boyfriend is going to see that she’s not putting all that energy into me now, and that’s going to change his perspective on you.
He’ll notice the difference.
His going to think, maybe she’s changed now. Maybe she’s got something else going on.
And if you give that impression that you’ve got something else going on, it’s like knowing a secret that he wants to know. It’s going to gravitate your ex back to you because his going to want to know what you have going on.
He’ll be drawn to wanting to know the new you, why you’re so happy now, why you’re so confident now, why you’re so comfortable with yourself and why you don’t care about what they think any more.
And start that relationship from a healthy foundation, it’s not so lopsided. When you do that you have a much better chance of making the relationship work.
Ok now that you understand the biggest mistakes that you are making, it’s time to learn the first step to getting your ex boyfriend back.